>>>Daft Cinema<<<

I can make this stuff up. I’ve tried and it just doesn’t work. You won’t believe some of the things people do, or the stupid things they say, even when they do something as simple as go out to the movies. Come join the fun!

Q-Man Novelty Easy Chopsticks

Designed for easy use this unique set of tongs-meets-chopsticks resemble a human form with arms, legs, and a head. The Q-Man Chopsticks are dishwasher safe, come in 4 colors, and are easy enough for children to use properly. If you’re anything like me, the Q-Man Chopstick set is both a novelty collectible and a stylish but practical addition to the dining table.

Available on Amazon for under $10, these would make cute stocking-stuffers or terrific gifts for you favorite blogger. ;-)

A Westerner’s cheat sheet for Japanese emoticons. We’ve all seen them, especially on twitter. Our Japanese friends make the most intricate and adorable emoticons out of their characters and text. I’m going to show you a website that lets users with a Roman alphabet keyboard integrate Japanese words with 2byte emoticons.

(*≧▽≦)オハツでっす♪

>>>Hiroette.com<<<

Here you can learn the differences between Western and Eastern emoticons (1byte and 2byte respectively) as well as the breakdown of the Japanese characters in each. The page is categorized with brief descriptions of what each is trying to convey. Technically you don’t have to “know” Japanese to use these, but it’s helpful since some have slight variations on meanings when different kanji are used. Nonetheless, don’t be afraid to use this as a resource to add some charm and variety to your tweets, blogs, and FB statuses.

Check out their website for a lot more information including bio sheets, affiliates, and video clips!
http://www.lacarmina.com/pirates/

Let La Carmina & The Pirates guide you on your next television expedition through the stormy seas of the Tokyo scene!

xTRiPx have been around since 2003 with a steadily growing reputation in the indies fanbase. This song is so easy on the ears. I love the guitar solo and the vocalist has a beautiful voice. They fall somewhere between O’share kei and indie rock, giving them a distinctive marking in a sea of clownfish. They’ve had some lineup issues but in 2009 released some new, very limited, material which marked their reunion.

So here it is. The majestic, awesome, amazing new video and single from His Highness, T.M.Revolution!

http://www.videouncovered.com/play/29885/tm-revolution/naked-arms.html

Sorry for the external link. Unfortunately, Youtube is diligent about stripping as much T.M.R. off their site as possible, including this hot new hit, so I had to go elsewhere for it. The good news is that website has every T.M.Revolution video ever made, so while you’re there watch some of his other PVs!

So my uncle began posting an A-Z of noteworthy bands on his facebook page and no sooner did he get to letter B than I decided to steal the idea for myself. And in keeping with tradition, I can’t simply post a youtube link and leave it at that, so I might as well use the opportunity to populate my blog some more.

First up is abingdon boys school, a modern hard rock band from Japan led by pop vocalist T.M.Revolution (Takanori Nishikawa). This band, who always insists on having their name spelled out entirely in lower case letters, is the collaborative effort of T.M.Revolution and his support musicians working together as a band instead of a solo artist + back-up players. The result is a more grungy, post/alt rock amalgamation and T.M.R. gets to show off his aggressive vocal chops that we haven’t heard since his days with indie visual kei act Luis-Mary, all the while experimenting with a more frequent use of English lyrics. Guitarist Sunao also gets his chance to shine that amazing talent of his with some terrific solos throughout their catalog.

With a stylized school boy theme running throughout their albums, singles, and PVs (promotional videos), abingdon boys school have struck a popular chord with the Asian youth and are making waves across Europe. The U.S. is, as always, the last to jump on board but the band has announced they are planning more worldwide tours in the near future. I think they’d be a great addition to one of the major “radio rock” tours like Warped Tour or even to the Lollapalooza festival.

It’s hard to say who the band will appeal to in the Western market but I’d venture to guess that somewhere between Wolfmother and Mastodon, abingdon boys school will find their fanbase.

Today’s horror movies have become gagged up and irresponsible. The same could be said for romantic comedies, but this review isn’t about either type of film. Splice, the latest film by director Vincenzo Natali (known for his cult favorite, Cube) is less of a horror movie and more of a commentary on the human condition wrapped in sci-fi robes.

Much like Cube, Splice has elements of suspense and certainly takes the viewer in a new direction that couldn’t be imagined. Splice is by no means a great movie, but it does not make my list of horrible horror celluloid.

At face value, Splice is a terrible sci-fi suspense film that fails at truly gripping the audience and is too bizarre even for the post-Avatar diehards. Where to presentation excels is in it’s subtext. Splice takes on a multitude of intangible topics like love, ethical morality, the mysterious web of relationships, and what it means to be “human” and to have “humanity.”

**Spoilers Ahead**

Adrian Brody and Sarah Polley play rock-star bio-engineers Clive and Elsa who have created a new species from the genetic material of several different animals. This new creation is capable of producing hormones necessary for a new cattle vaccine and potentially provide cures for human diseases. The scientists’ program gets cut before they can experiment with using human genetic material in the next evolution of the creature. Elsa decides it’s more important to potentially save humanity by taking the experiment to the next level despite the risks and illegality of human cloning. Elsa wants to “damn the man” that is putting a potential cure on hold for the sake of making money, but Clive is torn about the use of human DNA in an experiment that could lead to the end of their careers.

Elsa’s experiment works. Sort of. The result is a hybrid of all the animals spliced into the genetic code, but with some startling surprises they didn’t expect. Clive feels the creature is in pain and should be relieved of it’s suffering, and they cane learn from it post-mortem. Elsa believes it’s wrong to kill the creature and wants to observe it’s unique life span in full. As the creature grows, it begins to shift from looking like a raw chicken on legs to a more humanoid form, which follows the scientists growing apprehension to treat the creature like an experiment. In it’s “toddler” form, Elsa tests the creature’s abilities for learning, recognition, imprinting, and other basic “sciency” stuff. Once Elsa realizes the creature is highly cognitive, she give it the name Dren. It’s at this point that everything changes for Elsa and Clive as emotions get in the way and they begin looking at Dren as a human/higher creation instead of an experiment.

Through the course of this, we discover that Elsa and Clive are lovers, struggling with the desires of parenthood versus a tremendously important career. We also learn that Elsa had a difficult childhood and is afraid of doing the wrong thing with a child of her own. Meanwhile, Dren is growing, learning, and becoming increasingly restless of her locked away existence.

As Dren’s humanity begins to show through more and more, the scientists have a difficult time remaining professional and end up taking the roles of parents. Dren also begins to develop a complex set of emotions ranging from fear of Elsa’s mother-like “punishment out of love” behavior to an Electra Complex lust for Clive’s tender fatherly expressions of concern and respect.

The great meltdown of the movie is when the roles and emotions get confused and entangled, forcing all the characters to act out in a volcanic explosion of confused morals and a misunderstood sense of responsibility to eachother, to Dren, and to mankind. In the end, it comes down to Elsa being paid to force an emotional separation with the child she is carrying in an effort to help humanity.

Splice explores relationships between parent and child, creator and creation, and science and compassion while debating the moral ethics of experimentation, financial exploitation, responsibility, and commitment. Glossing over the top is the philosophical query of what makes someone “human” and at what point does that person/creature deserve the same respect as a human rather than an experimentation.

Another question it poses is in what context does the same behavior become different for humans versus animals. More directly, there is a scene where Dren tempts Clive and he succumbs to his lust. Naturally, Elsa walks in on them making love in an “on the floor of the barn” tangle of lust and curiosity. Elsa is upset and feeling betrayed while the audience feels confused and sickened. But what makes Clive & Dren’s feelings wrong? She is not his daughter, and she is not fully an animal. Dren is very human, cognitive, and capable of being loved. Clive is “betraying” his commitment to Elsa, but even in today’s society there is little to be said for the subjective binds of romantic ties. On the flip side, Dren’s bio-chemistry undergoes a gender transformation and she becomes fully male. Dren escapes and attempts to kill the rival male, Clive. In her failed attempt to rescue Clive, Elsa is overpowered by Dren and then raped in an animalistic mating ritual. So which sexual experience is morally “wrong”?

On a side note, watching Dren’s evolution unfold is rather intriguing and well done. I give it about 5 seconds before we see Dren avatars in Second Life.

Viewing Splice as a run-of-the-mill horror film will disappoint nearly every viewer. If you are able to see beyond the buckets of blood to the principle content of twisted social morality, responsibility, and self-identity, you will find a deeply-involved metaphoric web of drama and revealing commentary. Go see it for some thought provoking ideas, but not for the great dialogue.

ZZWW Rating: 4/5 for letting the stupid people think it’s a dumb movie.

Well, it’s that time of year: graduation is upon us. I assumed it would stop meaning anything to me when I left college last year, somehow forgetting, as self-absorbed as most people, that my best friend still had a year to go at the same institution. So a few days ago I saw him off; into the same world that’s treated me indifferently over the course of the past year. He has the wanderlust (while in spite of my travels, I’m essentially a domestic creature) so I don’t know when I’ll be seeing him again; besides which, our friendship was so intense, and so tied to the miserable place in which we found ourselves, I think we both sense we need a sort of…mourning period before that relationship can become something else. Anyhow, it put me in mind of what is possibly the funniest, and certainly among the most depressing films ever made: the British cult comedy Withnail & I.

It’s hard to describe this film which is really simple in its premise. Two failing young actors try to kill time, and indirectly themselves, waiting onsuccess. One of them (the unnamed “I”) suggests a trip to the country: his more volatile and flamboyant friend, Withnail, spits back: “I’m in a park and I’m practically dead.” The film is a sustained exercise in the sort of comic dialogue perhaps only the British are capable of. My favorite part must be when Withnail, reading the paper, happens across the story of a shot-putter who is giving up steroids: “My God, this huge, thatched head with its earlobes and its cannonball is now considered sane.” A man remarkable for being huge and taking illegal drugs is newsworthy; Withnail, arguably a genius, languishes in obscurity.

Above: “I am a trained actor…reduced to the status of a bum!”

Why is that I, along with so many others, consider this so true to life? Not everyone’s situation (not even every young artist’s) is this desperate, with Withnail downing half a bottle of lighter fluid in place of booze, then asking for antifreeze. But it belongs to what I think of as the Aesthetic of Losers. So many films are about attractive people whose failures provide plot points; few actually linger, in a profound and unsentimental way, on what my jacket copy of Howard’s End calls “the grim edge of poverty and ruin.” To quote another cult classic, The Catcher in the Rye–after one of Holden’s teachers describes life as a game, he reflects, “sure, if you’re on the side with all the hotshots. But what if you’re on the other side, what kind of game is that? No game at all.”

The thing is, if we grow up in any kind of stable environment, we’re inoculated by society to believe it will look after us. It doesn’t. If a society is constructed on any sort of sound principals, it’s meant to insure “the greatest good for the greatest number.” What about the people who fall through the cracks?

When I saw Withnail last summer, I called my friend immediately and said, “you’ve got to watch this. It’s about two guys. It’s not that one reminds me of me, and the other of you; but they remind me of us.” It wasn’t the same situation by a long shot. In the film one of the characters eventually finds success; leaving the other–one imagines not without considerable pain–essentially, to die. I did happen to find some success. But my friend, unlike me, doesn’t aspire to be famous. He does feel the pain and injustice of life (or I should say, society) very sharply, and doesn’t yet know what he wants to make of himself. I know; the question remains, for me, if I’ll be allowed to make it of myself.

A little confused at the selection, though. I mean, if a major U.S. cable provider is going to put together a package labeled “Asian Entertainment” for the Asian Heritage Month celebration, one would think something from Japan would be included, yes? Apparently not if you’re Comcast. Also one would think that if you’re trying to push the On Demand purchase of Ninja Assassin, starring a world-famous Korean pop star, you’d have at least one of this songs available in the music category too. Guess again. At least there’s a Super Junior song, albeit a strange medley/lounge remix of two songs from the recent release, and at least they gave some attention to more recent Kpop acts like U-KISS and Beast, but where’s the DBSK? Where’s the Rain? Where’s anything from Japan or China or any of the other Asian country?

At least Comcast was decent enough to include some extended-play collections from the Philippines, not forgetting to count them in the Asian collection. But still…. not one song from Japan. Why not an Ayumi Hamasaki, Utada Hikaru, or Koda Kumi at least? Eh…. partial fail, Comcast.

We can be thankful for the mass exposure of some Asian music to the general American populace, so if you have Comcast, go check out the On Demand selections under Top Picks and show that the U.S. does care about foreign music.